Hypothetically speaking, let’s say I’m crazy. Hypothetically.
Now, hypothetically, let’s say I’m cheap.
So I’m (hypothetically) crazy, but I’m (theoretically) cheap, which leads to the conclusion that, though I might need mental assistance, I would never pay for a therapist. (And it’s fairly pointless to try therapy on one’s self…)
That’s what summer is for.
It’s like cheap therapy.
Family Therapy
***This particular form of family therapy is not recommended for anyone over 3 years of age…it can prove traumatic, leading to further psychological scarring.*** :)
Group Therapy
**Best implemented with spring rolls from Thai Village**
Psychoanalytical Dream Analysis
(which, for a 3 year old equates to Behavior Modification)
Hypnotherapy
A natural byproduct of late nights outside, park adventures, social overstimulation and weekend outings.
Fresh Air and Dirty Hands Therapy
Art Therapy
Pizza Picnic in the Park Therapy
Jane Austen Therapy
Music Therapy
Jack’s Mannequin/The Fray
(Before the concert)
(After the concert—never underestimate the power of music to calm the savage beast…or dispel Crazy Eyes)
Shameless plug: For an at-home version of this therapy, feast your ears upon The Glass Passenger from Jack’s Mannequin. GUARANTEED goodness. :)
Wilderness Therapy
VERY IMPORTANT NOTE: This outing contained no camping or camping paraphernalia. It was a lovely day-long adventure sponsored by my in-laws, full of beautiful meadows and towering trees, that ended in a refreshing shower and indoor slumber.
So, never fear, the Anti-Camper lives on happily, sans tent, campfire, unnecessary dirt, Hygiene Posers (outhouses) and insect visitations for ANOTHER SUCCESSFUL SUMMER!! LIVE ON!! LIVE ON IN CLEANLINESS AND COMFORT, DEAR ANTI-CAMPER!
(As you can see, it doesn’t always work for everyone…)
4 comments:
We found an internet connection today-yay! Now I can update my blog-as soon as everything is done :)
It has been a great summer--despite being pregnant through it. Your family has been especially entertained!
Wow! I just love the way you write things. You make everything so interesting and your unique spin on it all is especially entertaining.
It looks like you've had a great summer. I'm glad we've seen you guys throughout it. There's always a party at your house!
I'm so glad that we aren't the only ones who do Pizza Picnics. Every once in a while I think, "I really should actually pack a home-made lunch/dinner." And then I think, "WHY??"
Live on Anti-Camper!!! And from this girl who actually likes to camp, it's true that those one day adventures experiencing the beauty and fun of the outdoors ending in a shower and a BED are truly the best!
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