You Are Peppermint Flavored Gum

You have a sharp mind that is always churning. You are mentally hyper. You're always thinking of something. And while your mind is always on, you're not the most physically active person around. Some people make mistake you for being lazy, but the truth is: you never relax. You tend to get so deeply into your projects that you ignore everything around you. You are creative and cutting edge. You love telling people about your newest ideas and discoveries.

What Flavor Gum Are You?

Roly-Poly Love

Attention all Roly-Polies!

**The Roly-Poly Associatino of America is issuing a warning to its members regarding a certain 2-year-old's newly found fascination.

No roly-poly is safe!

Please keep off all sidewalks and areas visible to toddlers. There are no casulaties to date, but victims are exhibiting symptoms of PTSD from being forced to repeatedly roll into balls in fear for their lives.**

On a recent walk up the street, it was apparent that Bennett and I had interfered with some kind of Roly-Poly Convention. They were everywhere, scrambling to do whatever Roly-Polies do at a gathering. And we greeted each one in turn, adding a solid 15 minutes to a 5 minute walk. Bennett was very kind...just intrigued. I have a feeling this adoration is not--and will not--be reciprocated.

In addition to a recently discovered love of small, helpless critters, Bennett has become a

Renegade Sprinkler Runner.

Sounds serious....AND highly-skilled.

Surprisingly, one's resume does not have to be lengthy. In fact, Bennett got into the business without so much as a single credential. He just followed all the right steps.

For interested parties, follow these steps to break into the profession:

Step 1: Get dressed in church clothes. When you arrive at your grandparents' house in Price on Mother's Day, seek out the closest running sprinkler.

Step 2: Run through that sprinkler as many times as you can. Get thoroughly soaked. Invite your cousins to join in, especially if one is wearing a nice dress and the other has on his church shoes.

Step 3: Laugh loudly and add an occasional squeal so your mom knows she'll totally ruin your fun if she dares make you come in and dry off.

Step 4: Surrender to the mother figure when she makes you come in and dry off. It's just easier this way. And it's all part of your plan, anyway...

Step 5: When Mom goes out to the car for a change of dry clothes, bust out the back door and run through the sprinkler in your diaper.

And that's it!! You're now an official Renegade Sprinkler Runner! Congratulations!

Estrogen's Secret Gathering Place

Many are unaware that Estrogen recently had a secret weekend getaway.

And when Estrogen gets away, she GETS AWAY.

In style.

In luxury.

And even better, on the cheap. (Thanks, Calli's dad!)

Four grown women and eleven almost-grown young women from our ward headed to the gorgeous Zermatt Resort in Midway, Utah, last Friday for an overnighter. As leaders, we had promised the girls a nice, fat reward for a challenge issued at the beginning of the year.

We payed up--without actually having to pay...(Again, thank you, Calli's dad...)

HONORABLE MENTIONS OF THE OVERNIGHTER:

No tents involved.

No outhouses.

No flashlights.

No campfires.

(These all magically appear to torment me in June when Girls' Camp rolls around. Oh man. I'm already invoking self-talk methods to prepare for my once-a-year-only-and-forced-upon-me-by-my-calling Tent Experience. Gulp. Hurry...change the subject. I can feel myself getting woozy...)

Sleeping bags DID accompany the group, but they were used int he following fashion:

Pizza boxes were piled upon the table, chip and candy bags littered the ground. Swimsuits hung dripping in the showers from 3 1/2 hours of swimming. Embarrassing questions were asked and answered in a high-stakes game of "Have You Ever?" Pillows and blankets (and even a homeless pair of underwear) were strewn about the room...

And it was only 2 a.m. There were hours to go yet.

3:00 brought Ghost Hour...

4:00 brought Ghost Hour to a creeped-out halt...

and somewhere around this time,

the lamps were turned off...just in time to get up at

and head home.

Additional Notes:

If you think bodily functions will not be discussed because you are surrounded by seemingly refined girls, you're thinking is amiss and must be adjusted accordingly.

Three women between the ages of 25-30 saying, "No running in the hallways" apparently translates, "Go ahead and run in the hallways. In fact, the later, the better."

Jasmine has secret diva hair, Julianna needs to wear a mouthguard, Rachael and Calli ALMOST divulged secrets in their sleep had their words been in English, and Talyn is a good bodyguard in the dark of night. Isabel hates ALL people (not discriminatory) and Tyrnee actually DOES love her sister, although they do not kiss on the lips (necessarily noted). Jane is scared of bubble sheets. Stacey likes to get the dirty juice on everyone and Abby is related to Gumby. President Carla gets bed privileges, 1st Counselor Emily gets couch privileges and because 2nd Counselor Nicole thinks alien romance is more exciting than 4 a.m. conversations, she gets the floor.

Shea and Christopher have figured out how to be bodyguards from 2 bulidings away.

Estrogen needs a nap after a good Getaway.

Tasty

A new Delicious Word:

CONCUSSED

(as in, the state of having a concussion)

Emotional State of Foliage

"NO, NO, PLEASE!" the eight tomato plants shouted to the Tomato Gods. "Anyone but HER! We want to LIVE, do you hear? LIVE, not SHRIVEL and DIE!"

This is what I imagine the eight tomato plants I recently acquired were shouting at the top of their tomato lungs when they noticed just WHO had plucked them from their promising growing career.

I have not been, shall we say, the most SUCCESSFUL tomato raisin' woman in the past. And word has gotten around the Foliage Community.

I'm sure my tomato plants screamed out a warning to the Marigold family moving into my front flower bed. The Marigold family probably alerted the English Daisies (my favorite flower) moving into Pot #5 and the English Daisies most likely passed the warning along to their neighbors down the row. (I'd tell you their names, but I have forgotten--the Purple Flowers is the best I can do.)

HOWEVER....

their botanical little selves may be in for a pleasant surprise and a long, productive life.

You see, my soul --in conjunction with my stomach--cries out for SALSA, SALSA, SALSA and I must cultivate only the juiciest salsa material.

My tomato plants have received unmatched nurturing and an outpouring of parental concern.

My front yard yearns for color and beauty and this non-green thumb is determined to at least become green-ish.

Monotony:The True Story of One Tastebud's Negligent Owner

When we lived in Vegas, we tried out new, don't-find-it-in-every-city restaurants as often as possible. (And there were plenty to choose from...) Now that we no longer live there, our tastebuds have been feeling, quite simply, starved for something FRESH and EXCITING. We're always on the lookout for something new on their behalf.

In the meantime, I thought I'd share some of our favorite places.

(Keep in mind, I am not into gourment/fancy-schmancy or seafood...)

The best dern bar-b-que joint West of the Mississippi...

Inside the Venetian in Vegas, this restaurant's menu could quite possibly pass as reading material--it's lengthy and all-encompassing.

If you want REAL New Mexican food (SO much different than regular Mexican food), you need only travel to Mesilla, New Mexico, to find it. Don't worry...you won't get lost. Unroll your window and follow the mouth-watering smell of sopapillas and chimichangas that floats in the air.
After you've made a little trip to New Mexico, it's not much farther to Hawaii. :) If you're ever on Oahu and the opu is a-grumbling, treat it to the Grass Skirt Grill. If you don't feel like doing the Hula on the beach in your skivvies after you've tried this place, you never will. (Please allow yourself at least 45 minutes for digestion to avoid cramping during dancing. Thank you.)

Feeling at all jungley or safari-ish? Try it.


While in Denver, we walked into BDs and LOVED it. It's a cool new concept with countless flavors. Mmmmm...

Sorry to tease, little tastebuds....